Personally, I thought that similarity and attraction seemed to go against common sense. In fact, similar backgrounds offer the appropriate conditions for emotional comparison. Thus, we frequently feel envious of or happy for people who were born in the same city as us, or we frequently fall in love with someone who is similar to or resembles someone from our past. When we are in the same situation again, it gets better, just like memory.
However, similarity might be a hazy property. Love depends on a variety of different factors, so reducing it to just similarity would probably be oversimplifying. Even so, maintaining romantic relationships occasionally requires a degree of similarity.
We frequently say that our partner should be right at the center of our comfort zone when referring to the idea of temperature. This is completed by the similarity factor, which guarantees that we will feel comfortable with our partner. However, the partner must be willing to step outside of our comfort zone in order to maintain excitement in the relationship. Meaning that while opposites do attract because they raise our temperature, significant differences will upset our emotional balance and cause us discomfort.
Although choosing a partner obviously depends greatly on similarity. When choosing a partner, one must consider how similar their temperaments are to other people in related domains. In fact, similarity and marital status quality are directly correlated via personality-related domains, but not via perspective-related domains. It appears that people are drawn to and end up marrying partners who share their attitudes and values, but often have different temperamental traits.
However, in a very committed relationship, temperament compatibility—which is easier to notice—is the main factor that influences marital happiness. As the commitment of the relationship grows, temperament compatibility becomes even more important.
We have a tendency to become enamored and stay with people who have profound similarities with us, which can be seen at different stages of a relationship. Such fundamental similarities need not prevent differences associated with surface manifestations from occurring; in fact, they may even encourage them.
Deeply shared structures and entirely different surface manifestations go hand in hand with profound love. Variations draw attention, but only when there is a common general framework that provides lots of room for complementary variations. Change is difficult and unlikely. Selecting people who share your initial desires and objectives is therefore simpler.
